“No more of this nonsense!” said Benjamin’s mother. “To bed with you right now!”
“But, Mama,” said Benjamin. “The monster…”
“I’ve already told you, Benjamin. There is no monster. You were only dreaming. Now go to bed.”
“Please, Mama, please. Let me stay up a little longer. Please. Please.”
“No, Benjamin. It’s time you learned the difference between dreams and real life. You go to bed — and right now! I’m not going to tolerate any more of your foolishness.”
Benjamin knew his mother wasn’t going to change her mind, so he shuffled to the stairs, dragged his feet slowly up the steps, and got ready for bed. His mother kissed him good night, gave him a hug, and said No when he asked for a story.
“You don’t need a story tonight. You need to go to sleep and get over this monster foolishness.”
When his mother left, Benjamin thought and thought. “What shall I do? What shall I do? If I go to sleep the monster will get me.”
[What do you suppose Benjamin decided to do?]
“If I don’t go to sleep, the monster won’t be able to get me,” Benjamin thought. So he got out of bed, sat in his chair, held his floppy bear tight, and looked around him. There was the bookshelf. There was his toy truck, and there were his fire engine and his airplanes. Benjamin held the bear tighter.
“I must not fall asleep,” he said to himself.
And there were his curtains, and there was the bed, and there was the closet door.
“I must not fall asleep,” he said to himself. And there were his shoes, and there was his chest of drawers, and there was the closet door.
“I’ll just take a look and see what’s in the closet,” he said to himself. “It looks different from the last time I went in there.”
He opened the closet door.
[And what do you suppose he saw?]
Benjamin saw a tv screen. On it was a message: “ONE MOMENT, PLEASE.”
After a while the screen went blank. Wavy lines appeared. The screen went blank again, and another message appeared: “THIS WAY, PLEASE.”
And there was a big red arrow pointing down.
“Down?” said Benjamin. “How can I go down?”
The screen went blank, the wavy lines appeared, and there was another message: “TAKE THE ELEVATOR, NITWIT.”
Benjamin noticed an elevator at the back of the closet.
“I never saw that before,” he thought to himself.
“YOU NEVER LOOKED WITH YOUR INNER EYES BEFORE, LAMEBRAIN,” said the screen.
Benjamin went to the elevator door and pushed the button. There was a hard clanking noise, something grated, and suddenly the floor shook and heaved so hard he reached out for the wall to keep his balance. His hand went right through, and he was falling, falling, falling — but slowly. As he fell he could see the elevator coming up, and in it were two glowing eyes and a large set of yellow teeth.
“Growl! GROOOUUUUWWWWLLLL!” went the teeth.
“GROOOUUUUWWWWLLLL! What are you doing over there? Can’t you wait for an elevator?” said the teeth.
“Please, sir,” said Benjamin. “I’m falling. Can’t you stop me from falling, sir?”
“Falling? What are you doing that for, you twerp? Why don’t you take the elevator like other people?”
“Please, sir,” said Benjamin. “I fell through the wall.”
“You better think up a better story than that, you sniveling kid. That’s the same story the other kid used last week before I went GRMPF, GRMPF, and ate him up.”
Benjamin didn’t know what to do or say. He had too many things at once to be frightened of. He was falling and might crash to the floor or bottom or whatever it was at any moment. He was frightened by the two eyes and the yellow teeth. He was frightened at the growling. And especially he was frightened of being eaten up.
“Please, sir. Please, sir,” he stammered.
“Oh, all right. You kids are all alike. Helpless. Whimpering. Can’t do anything for yourself. Always wanting me to do things for you. Why aren’t you brought up right? Why do I always have to help you? Let me see. How do you get this elevator to turn around? Where’s the steering wheel? There must be one somewhere.”
Benjamin and the elevator were getting farther and farther apart. In the distance he could hear the yellow teeth above him muttering.
“What are all these buttons for? Why can’t anybody make anything right any more?”
And then the elevator began to turn in a large circle, and pretty soon it was moving crossways above Benjamin, and then it started to move down, and then it went faster and faster until it was below Benjamin, and then BANG! BAM! and the voice of the yellow teeth cried out, “GOOOOM! GOOOOM! Ouch!”
Benjamin turned over as he floated down and looked below him. He saw the elevator on its side and something large and black next to it. Down and down he floated until finally he came to rest with a bump — right on top of the large black thing!
“GROOOUUUUWWWWLLLL! GROOOUUUUWWWWLLLL!” said the large black thing. “Who gave me that poke?” and the large black thing turned over, causing Benjamin to slide to the floor like sliding on a horsehair blanket. Two large black eyes and two rows of yellow teeth appeared in the midst of the black furry lump of a thing.
“Please, sir. Please, sir,” said Benjamin. “It was just me. I landed on top of you. I didn’t mean to hurt you.”
“Hurt me! Hurt me! Who said anything about hurting! You couldn’t hurt me if you used the powers of the witch of Endor. You couldn’t hurt me with all the armies of Assyria and Babylonia. You couldn’t hurt me — ”
“ — Yes, sir. Yes, sir. Of course, sir. I couldn’t hurt you. I’m much too small, and even great big people — lots of them — couldn’t hurt you.”
“You betcha, kid. You betcha. Now what was it you wanted? You wanted me to do something for you before I eat you up. Now what was it?”
“Please, sir. Please, sir. Don’t eat me up. I’m just a little boy. There isn’t very much of me, and besides I’m skinny and stringy and I’m sure I wouldn’t taste very good.”
“Don’t interrupt me, babbler. What was it I was supposed to do?”
“You were going to help me stop falling.”
“Oh, well, yes. Stop falling. Well now, we don’t have to worry about that any more, do we? Just be sure not to do it again, do you hear?”
“Yes, sir. Yes, sir. I won’t fall again, if I can help it.”
“If you can help it! Hah! That’s just like you weaklings, you can’t help anything. You’re always falling and always whining and always needing help. I never need help. Why can’t you be strong like me? … Now come over here. It’s time for me to go GRMPF GRMPF.”
Benjamin had a feeling he knew what GRMPF GRMPF meant, but he asked anyhow. “’GRMPF GRMPF’? What does that mean?”
“Aha! Aha!” said the black thing. “You’re not only weak and helpless and can’t keep from falling: you’re a dumbunny too! A GRMPF is what I am, and GRMPFing is what I do. I’m a GRMPF and I GRMPF.”
“But what is GRMPFing?” said Benjamin.
The yellow teeth widened and turned upward. The GRMPF tilted the top of its lump of a body to one side, and a coo slithered from deep inside, “Come here sweet thing. Come here lovely child. And I’ll show you!”
Benjamin felt the hairs on his head rise. Sweat spurted out of all the pores of his body. He whirled around and ran. And ran. And ran. He heard a loud bump, and then a rumble. The surface beneath his feet shook. He ran faster and faster. The rumble came closer and closer until he could hear heavy panting. And then he could feel hot breath on the back of his neck. From far away he heard a scream, and he screamed and screamed —
“Benjamin! Benjamin!” said his father, as his father reached over and enfolded him in his arms. “Benjamin, what’s wrong? Why were you screaming?”
“The GRMPF! The GRMPF was after me.”
“You mean that monster you’ve been telling your mother about?”
“Yes, daddy. He’s a GRMPF and he’s going to eat me up.”
His father held Benjamin closer, stroked Benjamin’s cheek and hair, gave him a hug and a kiss, and said, “Well, we have a problem, don’t we? You’ve got an imaginary monster after you, and we don’t know what to do about it. I’ll tell you what. Why don’t you lie down in bed. We’ll leave the light on, and I’ll stay right here until you’re asleep and even after you’re asleep. I’ll stay here until I’m sure you’re asleep without any monsters, and I won’t go back to bed until then. And when I do go, I’ll leave the door open so I can be here right away if you need me.”
Benjamin slept peacefully that night.
In the morning Benjamin overheard his parents talking. “What are we going to do?” they said. “What are we going to do?”
“Perhaps we should ask your father to talk with Benjamin,” said Benjamin’s mother.
“I know what you have in mind,” said Benjamin’s father. “Father is a loving, gentle soul, but my father has weird ideas. If you want Benjamin to stop believing in monsters, if you want him to tell the difference between dreams and real life, don’t ask my father to handle this problem. He’ll probably solve it all right. But Benjamin will end up believing in dreams and spirits and who knows what else.”
“But we’ve got to do something!” said Benjamin’s mother.
So Benjamin and his grandfather had a talk. Benjamin told his grandfather all about the GRMPF.
“A GRMPF is it? A GRMPF. I don’t know that kind of monster. You say it was a big black lump with two eyes and two rows of yellow teeth? That’s not much to go on. Sounds like your standard frighten-little-helpless-children type monster, but you never can be sure without an examination. Now I’ll tell you what you should do, Benjamin. Do you know how to pray?”
Benjamin knew the Lord’s Prayer and Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep.
“Ok,” said grandfather. “You need two things. You need protection from the monster. You need someone on your side who is bigger and stronger than the monster, someone right beside you the monster will be afraid of. And you need a discerner. Do you know what a discerner is, Benjamin?”
“No, grampa. I never heard of a dis … dis …”
“Discerner, Benjamin. Discerner. A discerner is a discerner of spirits, someone who can tell spirits apart. We need to know what kind of monster this is. Is it an outcast or is it an enemy? — and when we know that, we’ll know what to do.”
“What’s an outcast, grampa, and an enemy?”
“Well, it’s a little complicated, Benjamin, but I’ll tell you the easy part. You don’t need to be afraid of outcasts. They never harm anybody. But an enemy is different. You really need to be afraid of them.
“Now here’s what we’ll do. Tonight, just before you go to bed you kneel down and pray to Jesus. Ask him to send you someone to protect you and to do a discernment. ‘Lord, Jesus,’ you should say, ‘please send me a protector and discerner.’ Can you say that, Benjamin?”
Benjamin practiced the prayer until he got it right.
“And I’ll pray for you too, Benjamin. I’ll ask the Lord to send you a protector and discerner.”
“Will it work, grampa. Will it work?” asked Benjamin.
“Yes, Benjamin. It will work. When you ask the Lord for protection and discernment, he’ll give it to you. I wish I were going with you. It should be a lot of fun.”
That night Benjamin prayed as he and grandfather had planned. He was not afraid—maybe just a little tense, and very excited — but not afraid to speak of. But he couldn’t sleep. So he sat in the chair once again, with his floppy bear, and he looked at the things in his room, and after a while he went to the closet door.
[And what do you suppose he saw when he opened the door?]
When Benjamin opened the door, he saw a tall skinny young man with a big nose and a big Adam’s apple and long arms and long lumpy hands.
“Who are you?” asked Benjamin.
“I’m Uriel the 23rd, specialist P2D3. Did you get that? P2D3!”
“What’s P2D3?” said Benjamin.
“Protector second-class, Discerner third-class. I’ve just been promoted. In fact I was promoted early. Usually, with your ordinary angel or archangel the boss makes you wait at least three thousand years before promotion to second-class Protector. But I made it in only two thousand. Discerning takes longer. It’s harder than Protection. So I probably won’t make second-class Discernment for another five thousand years.”
“Oh,” said Benjamin. (He didn’t know what else to say, but felt he should say something. Then he realized he didn’t remember the person’s — or was it angel’s — name.)
“Please, sir. What’s your name again?”
“Don’t be afraid of me, Benjamin. I’m your Protector. You don’t need to be afraid of your Protector. Come over here. I want to give you a hug.”
Benjamin had never been hugged like that before. Not even by his mother or father. The hug was vast. It was deep. It was warm. It was like sinking deep into a pile of soft quilts—only it was softer and vaster and even more assuring.
“But you mustn’t fall asleep, Benjamin. We have work to do. My name is Uriel the 23rd. That means that my great ancestor was Uriel, one of the four archangels of God, and I’m the 23rd Uriel in his line. We Uriels help people make journeys. Up until now I’ve always gone along as a helper and learner with Uriel the 22nd, but I did so well on our last trip that I was promoted and given this solo.”
Uriel the 23rd looked around, saw the elevator at the back of the closet, and said, “Are you ready? Shall we take the elevator?”
Benjamin shuddered, moved closer to Uriel the 23rd and said in a small voice, “Yes. I’m ready. Let’s go!”
Uriel the 23rd pressed the button.
[And what do you suppose happened next?]
There was a hard clanking noise, something grated, and suddenly the floor shook and heaved so hard Benjamin reached out for the wall to keep his balance.
His hand met another hand! Uriel the 23rd had put his hand between Benjamin’s hand and the wall!
“The old insubstantial-wall trick. Humph! This must be a monster fifth rate. Now we’ll probably have to wait a long time for the elevator. These monsters fifth rate never know how to keep their materiel in proper repair.”
Uriel the 23rd was right. They sat down and waited and waited and waited. Finally they could hear the elevator was almost at the door. Uriel the 23rd stood and faced the door. He seemed taller than before and he glowed and he filled the closet with light.
The elevator door opened.
There was a long silence.
“Please, sir,” said a small voice. (But I’m not talking, thought Benjamin.) “Please, sir. May I go?”
“No, you may not,” said Uriel the 23rd. “Benjamin, come stand beside me. Do you see this big black thing? Now what do you think? Which kind of spirit is this? Is this an outcast or is it an enemy?”
“But how do I tell, Uriel the 23rd? How do you tell them apart?”
“Have you made a bargain with this monster? Has he offered you anything or promised you anything in return for something from you?”
“No. He’s just threatened to eat me up. I’ve never made a bargain with him or any promises.”
“Good. Then it won’t be hard for you to tell what kind of monster he is. Once you make bargains or promises it’s more difficult.”
“Why is that, Uriel the 23rd?”
“All monsters want something from you. That’s what makes them monsters. But they want different things. Enemies want one sort of thing and outcasts want another. Enemies want you to become like them. Enemies want to be the way they are. But outcasts want to be different. Outcasts don’t want to be the way they are. Outcasts keep hoping that if they eat you or touch you or control you, you will change them.
“Now, Benjamin, which kind of monster is this? Does this monster want something from you that will help him be different? Or is this monster trying to make you be like him?”
“I think,” said Benjamin. “I think…”
[What do you think Benjamin decided? What kind of monster was it? Was it an enemy or was it an outcast?]
“I think,” said Benjamin, “it’s an outcast.”
“I think so too,” said Uriel the 23rd. “Now I have something for you to do. To cure outcasts you must touch them with love. Hugs are best of all. Can you hug this monster? Are you brave enough?”
Benjamin shivered. “But he’s too big. I can’t get my arms around him.”
“Just try it.”
Benjamin took a deep breath. He straightened his back. He marched into the elevator. He went up to the GRMPF, put out his arms, and touched him. His arms went around and around, and his hands joined together on the other side, and he felt like a big cloud, a soft and warm and floating cloud that held a large and quivering boy. The GRMPF quivered and quivered until suddenly Benjamin knew the GRMPF was crying.
After a while the GRMPF relaxed and eased out of Benjamin’s arms. He seemed smaller now, and less furry. Benjamin looked up and there stood a boy — just like himself!
There is lots more I could tell you about the other boy, but that’s another story. I’ll just stop this story here.
Benjamin and Uriel the 23rd saved a GRMPF. They rescued a boy from feeling outcast and unloved and monstrous.
Warner White